Last night- The Bomb from Cherry Valley Deli in West Hempstead, NY. This immaculate creation features grilled steak, bacon, cheddar, onion rings and gravy all on a toasted garlic hero (which basically means on garlic bread). Thank goodness they do not have a website with a calorie calculator because I am estimating it to be in the 1600+ range. Coincidentally, this 24-hour Long Island deli could also serve as a Pringles' Museum as it had a bigger selection of the tennis-ball-canned potato chips than I have ever seen before.
2004ish- The deep-fried stuffed cheeseburger from Tuckers Tavern in New Orleans, LA. This and the following sandwich should help to explain why New Orleans is consistently ranked as one of the most unhealthy cities in the United States and why I gained 40 or so pounds while living there. Anyway, I had been hearing about a restaurant with deep-fried cheeseburgers for a while during my New Orleans experience. I thought it was a myth, but when I was a senior I found what I was missing. Tucker's Tavern is a hidden gem in the city located near the Superdome. It is far enough off the beaten path that it mostly caters to locals and a few lucky visitors. It is more of a bar than a restaurant and it has a normal menu, with the exception of the deep-stuffed cheeseburger page. They had about 8 or 10, all of which I tried, but I will fill you in on my favorites:
- The Club - A half pound of ground sirloin stuffed with roast beef, ham, turkey, bacon and cheese. This is then battered and deep-fried. To top it off, it was then dredged in ranch dressing. I have no idea why they took this last step and only my arteries have bothered complaining about it.
- The Cajun - A half pound of ground sirloin stuffed with bacon, spicy cajun sausage and cheese. Once again, battered and deep-fried. It was dredged in hot sauce.
I am sure you are intrigued and your mind may be trying to grasp how this is possible. Basically, these burgers looked like a giant crabcake on a bun. And you guessed it- they were delicious.
2003ish - A French Fry Po' Boy at some shack in Chalmette, LA. I don't remember the specifics of this incident. It was from my New Orleans days, which are a little hazy at best. Anyway, Chalmette is a small town about 25 minutes east of New Orleans. I can't remember the name of the restaurant where I got this monster at, but it was near the water and I heard Chalmette got hit fairly hard by Katrina so it may no longer be there, but lets hope for the best. I remember it was a hot day and I was sweating like a whore in church, which, with the sheer volume of the sandwich, helped to absorb the 14 beers I drank and make it safe for me to drive home. Anyway, a Po' Boy is a sandwich on French bread, much like a 'Hero' in the northeast. This French Fry Po' Boy consisted of a loaf of french bread, buttered and mayonaised, topped with French fries and melted cheese. I am pretty sure it had gravy on it as well. Needless to say, this sandwich has not been endorsed by Dr. Atkins.1999ish - The Octal-Octal from In-N-Out Burger in Phoenix, AZ. All right, I made this sandwich up. It is not on the menu, but I did order it. Back when I was in high school, a burger chain from California (In-N-Out) made local headlines by opening a few locations in Phoenix. Everyone loves In-N-Out for its friendly service and great fast food burgers. For the first few months, going to an In-N-Out meant waiting in line for 90 minutes before ordering since the Valley of the Sun could not get enough of these heavenly burgers. The prices 8 years ago may or may not be the same. They had an unadvertised special at In-N-Out was $1.50 for a the first patty and $1 for each additional hamburger patty. Most people stop at the famous "Double-Double" which is two patties. If you have never eaten at an In-N-Out, the hamburgers are of fair size, approximately equivalent to a quarter-pounder from McDonalds. I got to thinking about the record books and inquired to the drive thru attendant (after a 90 minute wait) what was the most patties someone has ever ordered. The answer was something ridiculous like 23. As my group of friends' resident heavy eater, I was dared into gluttony. I conservatively went for 8 patties, hence the name Octal-Octal. I ate the entire thing and an order of French Fries and considered it one of my crowning achievements at the time. Also, In-N-Out's website (http://www.in-n-out.com/) has a nutritional chart. A single cheeseburger has 480 calories while a Double-Double has 670. Assuming a single patty is 190 calories (670-480), the Octal-Octal has an astonishing 1810 calories. Which, at my height and weight would take over 2 hours of running on the treadmill at 6 MPH to burn off.
Lastly on my list is a sandwich I have never had, but have only dreamed about. My friend Evan works for the Gateway Grizzlies, a Minor league baseball team located in Sauget, IL, just outside St. Louis. Evan gave me the heads up back in the beginning of 2006 on this next sandwich, which soon made headlines with obese people everywhere. It is the Krispy Kreme bacon Cheeseburger. Basically it is a bacon cheeseburger served on a Krispy Kreme donut instead of a bun. Here is a link to a better description and picture- http://www.gatewaygrizzlies.com/news/?id=2743.
If you are ever in Sauget, stop by and check out the 2003 Frontier League champions and you may run into me trying my first Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheeseburger.
1 comment:
I used to work at a place in New Orleans called The Dough Bowl. Although a lot of the sandwiches were good, I quickly took a liking to the Club sandwich. The Club at The Dough Bowl was three slices of toasted bread, cut into quarters. In between the bottom two slices of bread was ham and cheese. In between the top two slices was bacon and turkey and cheese. There was mayo and mustard on the bread. Since there were three slices of bread, I referred to the Club as the 3-Iron. But since I worked there some of the perks were being able to customize my own sandwiches. After establishing a good rapport with the head chef, I would occasionally order a 5-Iron (5 slices of bread.) The most ridiculous thing I ever did was to order a 9-Iron. Nine slices- 4 pockets of ham and cheese, 5 pockets of turkey cheese and bacon. Lots of crumbs on the shirt. Lots of pounds gained. Lots of money stolen from the register. Lots of not showing up at work. Lots of getting high while making deliveries. I can't believe they fired me.
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